11 Weeks

So I thought I would put one of these little pregnancy surveys up.  I don't know if I'll do it every week, but I didn't do an official one with the boys, so I thought it might be fun.

How far along? 11 weeks. Baby is the size of a lime!
Total weight gain/loss:  As of the beginning of last week, I was down about 12 lbs. I haven't weighted myself since.

Maternity clothes? I've been wearing all maternity pants, although I've been folding down the band this time, something I did not do with Tyler or AJ. My nausea and gas seem to be much more in my upper tummy, so the band is often uncomfortable.
Stretch marks? No new ones
Symptoms: Nausea (though I am taking some medicine and it's much better), fatigue, sore breasts (still!), vivid dreams (seriously! All. Night. Long), gas (I've never burped so much in my life), food aversions.
Sleep: I love sleep. I often fall asleep on the couch around 8:30 and sometimes I'll just go on to bed by 9:00 or 9:30 if I'm still awake then. If I feel sick, I go to bed earlier. I often rest or catnap on the drive home from work and if I'm at home I sometime doze off when AJ is napping in the afternoon.
Best moment this week: Seeing baby on ultrasound, always a relief
Have you told family and friends: Yes, pretty much everyone knows. We told family and close friends by about 9 weeks and we announced on facebook after our first official appointment last week. People are still finding out at work as word travels, but all official announcements have been made.

Movement: Too early
Food cravings: I don't really have cravings.  Maybe pickles? I'll just list a few things I'm tolerating. I'm snacking on a lot of cheese and crackers and sweet pickles. That sounds weird, but it's something we always have lying out on Thanksgiving, so it's a natural combo to me. I'm not very into food right now, so I'm leaning on a few things that taste good. Apples (I have to peel them though, which is weird for me), bagel thins with cream cheese, cheese wraps (tortilla smeared with cream cheese, then topped with cheddar cheese sliced and lettuce. Most people would also put ham or turkey on it, but I never do, even when not pregnant. Oh and I eat it dipped in BBQ sauce.  You'd think it was a pregnancy thing, but it's really not), and those little popsicles in the plastic sleeves.
Anything making you queasy or sick: Eggs.  Most meat. I'm managing on a little bacon, lots of cheese, and peanut butter for protein.  I went off meat with Tyler and shied away from it with AJ too. I can't drink soda or coffee and even hot tea isn't very appetizing. Basically I'm drinking water, occasionally iced tea or strawberry lemonade.
Have you started to show yet: I don't think so. I'm pudgy already, so I could pass for pregnant, but I don't think it's the real deal yet.
Gender prediction: We are hoping for a baby girl way too much to be subjective

 Labor Signs: No and it had better stay that way

Wedding rings on or off? On. I took them off with Tyler, but not with AJ
Happy or Moody most of the time: Up and down. This week I've been a little stressed.
Milestones: Another week down!

Other notes: At my ultrasound on Tuesday my SCH had grown to 7 cm, which stressed me out. The ultrasound tech talked to the doctor to be sure they didn't want to change my restrictions, and they just ended up saying I should make even more of an effort to take it easy this week.  I'm trying.  That's difficult.  Baby still looks great, but was at an odd angle so the pics weren't great. Another ultrasound Tuesday morning and then the next week I have my first trimester screening.

My bloodtests all came back fine, although my white cell count was a little low--I assured her the number was higher than it usually is. I have AB positive blood, as a point of interest. I knew before, but always forgot. They made me stop in for a weight check on Tuesday too, since I'd lost weight. Their numbers showed a 2 lb gain since last week (I was sure to eat and drink well Tuesday and I hadn't used the bathroom yet, so it was probably a little less than that, but it satisfied them).

Subchorionic Hemmorhage

**Disclaimer** this is my account of my very scary bleeding experience on June 6.  As of right now, baby is doing great, has a strong heartbeat and is measuring ahead of where we thought I was, so those are all good signs.  This may get a little graphic/tmi, but I want to document it.

On Monday, June 6th at about 10:00 pm I started getting ready for bed. I put away some laundry, went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth, etc.  I laid down in bed and basically immediately felt a gush of fluid.  I knew immediately that wasn't a good thing. I jumped up and ran to the bathroom and even then I could see blood running down my legs.  It was a lot of blood. I think I was just in shock at first and couldn't even think.  I started yelling for Adam and for  my sister because she was closest and I knew she'd hear me. Adam ran upstairs and kind of froze. My mom came up too and we all took in the scene. My mom got me a washcloth and she and Adam cleaned up the floor a little and Adam got me some clean clothes.

I got myself together and cleaned up as best as I could. I put a pad on an got dressed and we rushed out the door.  I just kept saying I couldn't believe this was happening.  I'd felt "fine". Fine as in pregnant and nauseated and the same as I'd been feeling for weeks.  I thought it was over and that I was miscarrying for sure.

We got the ER and Adam dropped me off at the door and went to park. I checked in and was quickly offered a wheelchair, which I accepted.  They took me right back to a room and a nurse came right in.  She was super nice and sweet.  It's all a blur, but I think the doctor--actually she was a PA, and accompanied by a medical student, came in pretty much right away.  They asked a lot of questions and I told them everything that had been happening. At that point, just by my last period, I thought I was 8 weeks and 3 days.  She explained that they'd take some blood to check my hormones and do a pelvic exam to start.  

The nurse took some blood and put in a IV shunt. The PA said all they could really offer me for the nerves was Benadryl, which I declined.  She checked my pulse and listened to my chest, noting that she could hear a heart murmur. I told her I'd never been told that before. She said it probably was nothing to be concerned about and it might just be a pregnancy thing, since pregnant women has a much higher blood volume than normal.

Then she did the pelvic exam.  Those are just never fun.  She had to clear a sizeable clot before she could start, which made my heart sink. I tried very hard not to think about what that might be. She said I was dilated about a fingertip, but that can happen so the clots can pass.  She indicated that it wasn't necessarily an indication that things were bad.

At that point, we just had to wait to get the blood test back. The PA said if my hormone level was over 3000 (and at the point I was in the pregnancy, it should be well over that), then they would do an ultrasound. If the hormone level was lower than that....well we'd know things weren't good and there probably wouldn't be anything to see on the ultrasound.

It took over an hour to get the results, which was just awful. Adam and I talked some, and we really were kind of defeated.  I don't think of it like we were being pessimistic, but I think we were trying to prepare ourselves for the worst.  I talked to the nurse and the PA about what they knew so far and IF this, THEN what, and all that, explaining that I knew they didn't have all the answers, but that it helped me to know the details of all the possibilities.  

It was surreal to talk about miscarriage and DNC and all that, but somehow, even while I was crying and upset to think about it, I wanted to know what I might be facing. 

Finally, the PA came in and said, "Your level is 181--" I cringed. "thousand."  So that's super high and it was a good sign for now. The nurse said I was super pregnant.  I knew that it wasn't a sure thing, but I definitely started to gain back a little bit of hope.

Soon after, they took me for an ultrasound. The technician said she would do an external first and then an internal. I asked if she would tell us if there was heartbeat. She hesitated, but said yes, she would. She said if she was quiet, that was a bad sign, but that the external would be harder to see much. So I told myself not to get upset during the external. She got started and during the external she didn't say much. Adam could see the screen but I couldn't. At one point I mouthed to him, asking if he could see anything and he sort of shrugged.  She did her measurements and whatnot and then told me to use the restroom and undress for the external. My bleeding was slowing a little bit at this point.

The internal seemed to take FOREVER. Toward the beginning she did tell us that she saw a heartbeat. She showed me the screen for just a second and honestly I thought the heartbeat looked slow, so I didn't even let myself feel a lot of relief. So then she went back to measuring and all that.  The worst part was when she wanted to examine my ovaries. I had to physically push down on my stomach with my hands and hold it there for a long time.  My arms ached and I was so tired--at this point it was probably after 1 am and I had taken half a unisom before I went to lay down at 10 pm. So that part sucked. Finally, she was done and she asked me if I was sure about my last period date. I said I was very sure (April 9th). I turned to Adam and said that I thought that meant the baby wasn't measuring correctly.  Then the tech said that I was actually measuring ahead at 9 weeks (actually I swear she said 9 weeks 3 days, but later they told me 9, so I'm going with that until my next ultrasound). I think that was the moment I felt relief. She also said the heartbeat was measured at 185 beats per minute, which was very good. She said the PA would tell me more after the report was processed.

So after we got back to our room, we waited some more. The sweet nurse came in and she was so happy to hear that we had a heartbeat! I updated my mom (I'd been calling her every time we had a shred of news) and my facebook baby/ttc group and then we waited. The PA came back and confirmed what we knew, that the baby measured great and had a great heartbeat. She said the bleeding was caused by a subchorionic hemorrhage. She described it as "small" measuring 5.2 x 0.6 x 3.8 cm. She said that it puts me at a higher risk of miscarriage, but for now the baby looks good. She said to take it easy and follow up with my OB the next day.  Later I read the ultrasound report and they measured the baby as 2.31 cm which corresponds to 9 weeks 0 days and that the cervix was closed and measuring 3.6 cm.

I stayed home Tuesday and Wednesday, resting and taking it very easy. I spoke to my OB office and they said my upcoming appointment scheduled for the following Tuesday was  a perfect time to check on everything. They said to take it easy, but that I could work as long as I was sitting most of the time. They said to call if I went through more than a pad in an hour.

Tuesday and Wednesday the bleeding slowed to mostly spotting and later in the week it turned from red/pink to brown, which is old blood and I took as a good sign.  I'm still spotting two weeks later, to varying degrees.

All in all, I feel ok. I'm obviously more nervous than I was before this happened. I have moments where I'm sure it's going to be ok, and I have moments where I worry. I never pictured going through something like this.  I'm so grateful that the baby is still with us and I pray every day that it stays with us.

Right now, they just want me to have weekly ultrasounds until the SCH resolves. My next ultrasound it tomorrow. The doctor's office also called today and wants me to be seen for a weight check too.  I've lost between 10-15 lbs since I got pregnant, which is very normal for me, I lost weight in the first trimester with both the boys. But for one reason or another, they are watching that too.

Thank you in advance for any prayers or well wishes you can send!  Baby number 3 really appreciates it and so do we!

SURPRISE!!!!

Yes, that's right, BABY NUMBER 3!!!

I still can't really believe it.  It's still sinking in, for sure.  By the way, I'm writing this Monday, May 9th, two days after I found out.  This will be published at a later date, and I'm sure there will be updates at the end. But I wanted to document this before I forget any details, because pregnancy brain is REAL!

So I'll start off by saying my cycles have changed a lot since I had AJ.  For the past 6 months, my cycles have only been 26-27 days. And I hadn't had a ton of success pin pointing ovulation. I had actually been starting to think I was probably ovulating too late in my cycle to get pregnant on my own.  But we were so busy, we basically had been sort of trying/not preventing.  I figured once the house was ready we would start focusing more on it.

So I wasn't really focused on my period, but I knew it was probably due around the end of the week before Mother's Day.  By the end of the week, a thought had entered the back of my head, but I still really didn't think much of it.  I had looked at my tracking app earlier in the week and it had predicted I would start Saturday, but it's usually more optimistic than I am, and usually I beat it to the punch.

Saturday morning, I woke up at 5:30 and couldn't sleep. My brain started whirring and so I got up and went to the bathroom, because I knew there was only one way to stop thinking about it.  The trouble was, I'm not in the habit of keeping pregnancy tests around and the only ones I had were from an auction Adam bought, and they'd expired in June 2015. I figured it would be negative anyway, so why not use it up?

Except it wasn't. I never look at my tests while they are processing--the whole "a watched pot never boils" thing....so I fiddled around in the semi-darkness, eventually counting to 120 so I knew three minutes has passed. I flipped on the light and there were two solid lines staring back at me. I think I whispered oh my god a bunch of times, but I was also reminding myself that the test was EXPIRED and therefore unreliable.  I snapped a picture with my phone and hid the evidence, then when back to bed. I used my phone to post a picture on my facebook group with my old Infertility buddies.  Their consensus was it was probably positive, but to get some more tests ASAP!

Now, I have had a BFP (big fat positive) three times before this.  With the boys, of course, and with my miscarriage in 2011. And each time, we had been really trying to get pregnant and Adam always knew when it would be time to test. This time, I had a slight edge. This time, it would be a surprise.  So I didn't say anything and acted casual. He needed to finish mowing the grass, so I was going to run errands with the boys by myself, then he was going to meet us for lunch and we would go to the hardware store to pick up somethings. So I had the perfect opportunity to buy pregnancy tests in secret.  I bought an 88 cent test to take that afternoon and a package of First Response.

After all of our running, I got the boys settled and Adam went upstairs to work on installing our closet doors.  I slipped back out to the van and grabbed the bag with the tests.  I put the First Responses and the box for the cheap test in my purse and took the test downstairs to the bathroom.  The test showed up positive right away!  I had a little moment by myself there.  It was really true.  And we weren't even trying hard. Somehow, on the day before Mother's Day, when there was only ONE possible day it could have happened, here I was, pregnant.

No doubt about it!

So now I had news to tell.  I planned on telling everyone together on Sunday, revealing it to mom through her present.  I had bought a kit of little foam owl crafts for Tyler to make her for Mother's Day/her birthday (her birthday fell on Mother's Day this year). So after AJ was napping, I took Tyler upstairs and told him the news!  We've talked about it before, and his friend Luke's mom is expecting, so he knew what it was about and was excited!  He won't stop talking about how he hopes it's a girl because we don't have any girls!

So Tyler made an owl for Gaga and I make two more. On the backs, we put the boys' names and on the third, I wrote "Baby #3, January 2017".  Later we were hanging around downstairs and Adam said, "Aren't you supposed to get your period pretty soon?" I tried to play it cool, casually checking my phone, looking at my app.  "Yeah, probably today or tomorrow." I said.  So he said we should play around that night, because he thinks that makes my period come. Uh oh. I decided I had better tell him. So I said I wanted to go up and see the new closet doors he'd hung. I snuck the test out of my purse and into my pocket and went upstairs. He came up after and so did my mom.  We looked at the doors and then mom when back downstairs. I closed the door and pulled out the test. I don't even remember if I said anything. He just started laughing and we hugged and laughed about how it only took once this time around!  I think he said are you kidding or are you serious or something.  LOL Then he admitted that he'd gone to get a receipt out of my purse and seen the box of tests. He thought I was going to test though, he had no idea I already knew!

So I still planned on telling my mom Sunday, but Adam started saying we should go ahead and tell her. I didn't need much convincing!  So I went upstairs and wrapped up the owls and gave Tyler the package. We took it to her and said, "Tyler made this and he didn't want to wait to give it to you." She opened in and oohed and ahhed over the owls. Then I told her he'd put his name on the back. The first one she turned over was the one that said baby.  She looked at me and then back at it and back at me. "Are you pregnant?" I nodded.  "Are you really?!" Then she screamed and jumped up and hugged me. Michelle came in too and everybody was talking and laughing and I was telling them about the whole day.  It was great!

Our family of owls

With the new addition!

On Sunday Angie came over and we showed her the owls too.  She BURST into tears!!  I was surprised, she'd never gotten so teary before, but she said it was because she wasn't expecting it.  It was really sweet!

So that's it for now!  I'm 4 weeks and 2 days according to my last period, but my guess is that I might be a couple of days further along than that. I don't know exactly when I ovulated. My OPK was close to positive on day 12, and less so on day 13, and I pretty sure it wasn't positive on day 11 (which is the day we conceived), so I don't know, somewhere around there.  I don't even have a doctor's appointment yet.  I called my OBs office but they haven't called back yet. I have a call into my rheumatologist too, just to be sure there isn't anything I should be aware of, given my lupus. I know my medication is safe to take.

So as of now, I'm due around January 14th. Given my history and previous C-Section, I will just schedule this one, which is kind of a relief.

What a ride this will be! Goals before baby number 3 arrives: Finish the house, sell it, move, and potty train AJ!  God help me! :-)

UPDATES:
 
WOW, I wrote this over a month ago!  A lot has been happening!  Tomorrow is my first Doctor's appointment. I will also have an ultrasound.  It's not my first ultrasound, however.  This post will get very very long if I tell the whole story, so it will get it's own post that I will publish in a day or so. Last Monday night (June 6th), I suddenly started bleeding.  I went to the ER and long story short, blessedly baby is okay!  The ultrasound showed the baby with a strong heartbeat (185) and actually measuring ahead at 9 weeks (by my last period I would have been 8 weeks, 3 days then).  I was diagnosed with a subchorionic hemorrhage (SCH). It was SUPER scary, but they aren't uncommon.  I was instructed to take it easy, NO lifting more than 10 lbs (no more picking up AJ), and put on pelvic rest.  We were SO relieved!

Symptoms: Morning sickness started about a week after we found out (BOO!). Also major gas (sorry), sore breasts, serious fatigue and many many food aversions.  I'm just hoping and praying these subside at some point, since with Tyler they really never did.  No throwing up yet, so that's a plus, I guess.  I've been taking the Vitamin B-6 and a half a unisom at night, per my doctor's advice, but it's not completely alleviating it. We'll see how it goes.

FIRST DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT W/ULTRASOUND
Everything went well today (6/14)!  The baby still looks awesome, with a heartbeat of 183. We could see it wiggling it's little arms!  When I asked if I was really seeing it move it's arms, the baby bobbed it's head and the ultrasound tech swore it was nodding!  SO CUTE! Adorable profile!  My SCH is still there and had grown a tiny bit. They'll continue to watch it with weekly ultrasounds until it starts to get smaller and resolves itself. She gave me some samples of dyclegis (which is similar to the B-6/Unisom combo I've been using) to see if it helps my nausea a little more. Everything looks great!

Already so photogenic!