It starts

I don't usually post cryptic Facebook posts. They can be irritating. It usually seems like the poster is looking for people to press them for details, like attention-seeking. I broke my rule of no cryptic statuses yesterday, though.

Here's what I posted:

I did something very cool today. No matter what the outcome, I'm proud of myself!

Yesterday my friend and I submitted our book to a publisher for the first time. More than two years of work, with the last two months spent getting feedback and preparing submissions documents. I just feel so accomplished, to have actually co-authored a finished product.

We sent a short synopsis, bios, marketing olan, and query letter. The response time is 3-6 weeks. So imagine shock to receive an email this morning from one of the editors! She said they would love to see the final manuscript and that the synopsis was very interesting.

Whoa.

This is happening. No matter what, and editor is going to read and consider our work. I can't really decide if I'm more excited or terrified by that prospect!

The coolest thing

New blog look!  I thought it was time to freshen up a bit!

So I've been wanting to tell this story for awhile, it happened in January!  However, I had to hold off for a little while.  But it's just too cool of a story for me not to share, and really, I want to have it here so I can remember it.

I've talked many times before about a group of my friends and their families.  The four of us girls have been friends since high school.  See this post for introductions.  We all lead pretty busy lives, but we try to get together at least for birthdays and Christmas.  At Christmas, we've taken to having a gathering of all the family, with our spouses and kids.  So in January, we made a plan to get together at Gabby's house for food and presents and fun.  Gabby and Pat have three year old little boy named Logan and Pam and Clif have 1 year old Harley.  The kids love to play together and we all get a chance to catch up. 

This time we were cooking pizzas and waiting for Pam and Clif to arrive.  Mandy and I were standing in Gabby's kitchen and talking. Mandy and Nate have been trying to have a baby for awhile, but it hadn't been easy.  I had wondered if she might have good news to report that day, not sure if that was wishful thinking for a "feeling" but I was disappointed that I hadn't been right!  She has PCOS, as well as something called a bicornate uterus.  So we were catching up on that, since I spent quite a lot of time reading up on various infertility subjects.  At one point, she casually mentioned that her period was actually late.  I pressed her for details and she downplayed it, saying her periods were irregular.  I pointed out that she was taking medication for her PCOS, and hadn't she been pretty regular since starting on it.  She admitted she had. I was trying sooo hard not to get excited, but it was hard!  I know how much Mandy and Nate have been wanting to start a family and I just wanted it so badly for them. 

After a few minutes, the others started overhearing our conversation and Mandy started to get kind of nervous about the whole thing, so we started talking about other things. I took her aside later and asked, very quietly, if she wanted me to slip out and go buy a test.  She said yes, so I ran to the grocery store under the guise of needing more chips.  I came back, slipped into the bathroom to hide the tests in a drawer, and returned to the party.  Not wanting added pressure for Mandy, we tried to act casual and she slipped off to the bathroom.

 A few minutes later, I heard the door open and Mandy said my name quietly (yeah I was totally lurking close by).  I joined her and she looked anxious. 

"I think there is a second line but I don't know, because it's so faint!" she told me.

I peered at the test (First Response) and I could definitely see a second line. Then I looked closer. 

"The line that's faint is the control line!  Your test line is using up all the dye!  You're pregnant!"

Omg can I just say it was the coolest thing in the world to be able to tell someone that!  We basically freaked out together in the bathroom and then I asked if she thought Nate (Mandy's husband) would be made that I found out before he did!  She said no and we laughed and hugged.  Then I went to get Nate.  At this point they probably knew something was up and I was totally determined not to give it away, so I just told him Mandy needed to talk to him. 

Then we all just celebrated!  It was just so special for them to find out that way, surrounded by friends and I felt so totally honored and blessed to be apart of such a special day in their lives!  Mandy is now 13 weeks pregnant and everything is going well!  I'm so excited to meet my new little honorary niece or nephew!

And I'd be lying if I said it didn't give me a little bit of baby fever!!!

Anniversary Awesomeness!

Hubby and I got the opportunity to go on a little overnight trip for our tenth anniversary!  It was amazing and I'm so so grateful to my mom and my sister for offering to watch the kids so that we could go!  It was our first overnight together since way before AJ was born and the first time we've really gone out of town together since our honeymoon!

Be warned!  Picture overload!

Adam was scheduled off work on Friday, so I took a vacation day.  We left the house around 8 am and drove to Columbus, IN. 

On our way!  So excited!

We stopped at a Goodwill store--Adam is an avid Ebay seller and he's always looking for deals on things he can resell. He found a few things and I found a cute Vera Bradley purse.  After we were done there, we continued on to Nashville, IN.  In Indiana, we don't really call it "Nashville" very often, probably because it's easy to confuse it with Nashville, TN.  We mostly just call in "Brown County" (Nashville, IN is in Brown County lol).  I'd been there a time or two with my parents when I was a kid.  It's basically just a tiny little town with lots of quaint little shops and B&Bs and a big state park.  It's quiet and everyone is super friendly.

Our first stop was a winery outside of town.  As I've mentioned before, I have tried some wines in the past but never really cared for them.  The Brown County Winery offered a good selection of sweet and semi-sweet wines, so Adam and I hoped we'd find something we liked.  We weren't disappointed!  The very first one we tried was great!  It was their Vista Red, a semi-sweet wine and their bestseller.  We tried a couple of others but we liked it the best, so we bought a bottle and a few glasses before heading back out.

A view of the road

Rocky!  No mountains in Indiana, but we've got some hills!

The best I could get of the amazing views

We decided to go on past Nashville to Bloomington for lunch.  A few of my friends and Twin have raved about a little pizza place there called Mother Bears, so we decided to try it.  It took forever to figure out where to park because all of these little businesses each have about 5-10 parking spaces and that's it. Each business has signs that says their spaces are for their customer's only.   Of course, all of the spaces at Mother Bears were full.  We drove around for awhile, trying to find something, but everything was either reserved or was student parking for Indiana University, which is right across the street.  Finally we gave up and parked at a photography studio that offered parking for $5 for non-customers.  The food was good.  The pizza didn't blow me away, but the cheese garlic bread was phenomenal and worth the trip on its own.

After lunch we went back into Nashville and found a place to park (paid parking, again) and we just walked from store to store.  They have a little bit of everything there, handmade items, jewelry, artwork, leather shops, and of course lots of food.  A former coworker of Adam's owns a shop there, so we stopped by and talked to him for awhile.  He gave us his recommendations for where to have dinner and breakfast on Saturday and I bought a really pretty butterfly necklace from him.  We eventually bought Tyler a fancy bug catching cup with a magnifier (my little explorer), an egg that hatches into a duck, and a pez dispenser, AJ a new Peek a Boo book, my mom several colored crystals, my sister a pair of striped toe socks (she loves them) and twin a cute little hedgehog made of seeds and twigs.  We also got some saltwater taffy, caramel corn, chocolate fudge (heaven) and a bag of the best German roasted almonds I've ever had.

The shop owner called these her "Happy Herd"! I wanted one!

This was so Adam's shirt, but they didn't have his size!

Yum, chocolate truffle!

Beautiful blown glass. I took this and then saw a sign saying no pictures. Oops.

Beautiful sculpture outside the visitor's center

So quaint

Every kind of taffy you could imagine

At around 3:00, we headed to our hotel to check in.  The lodge is run by an older couple who were really nice and welcoming.  We chatted with them for a few minutes and then went to check out our room.  It was a simple room, but the bed was covered in a cute quilt and had a nice frame and was comfy.

The Green Valley Motor Lodge

Pretty comfy bed

But the best part of the room was this:

Can I get a HOT TUB?!

As tempting as the hot tub was, we just changed our clothes for dinner and headed back out because we had appointment for MASSAGES!  Adam had never had one before, and he definitely enjoyed it.  I didn't know ahead of time, but they used hot stones during the massages!  I was surprised at first, but it was really nice, so relaxing.  After the massages, we walked a bit more and then went to a place called "Out of the Ordinary" for dinner.

Do not adjust your screen, there is really that much bacon on that BLT.  YUM!

After dinner, the shops were all getting ready to close, so we stopped in a few more and then ended up getting ice cream.

Cookies N Cream for Adam, Mint Chocolate Chip for me!

We shared our cones with a birdie!

Once everything had closed up, there wasn't much to do other than head back to the hotel.  We enjoyed the hot tub and drank the ENTIRE bottle of wine and even slept some ;-)

The next morning we woke up pretty early so we killed time playing Texas Hold 'Em with saltwater taffy as our chips!

Tasty betting

After that, we headed for the Artist Colony Inn.  Adam's friend Joe had said they had a great breakfast buffet, and he was right!  They had eggs, bacon, sausage, home fries, oatmeal, fruit, pancakes and best of all, fried biscuits rolled in cinnamon sugar with apple butter.  SWOON!  Adam tried his first and then said "Did you get one of those biscuits?" I nodded and he said, super seriously, "Eat it!"  It was heavenly!

After breakfast we started wondering when the shops would open.  We hoped it would be by 9 am, so we wondered around a bit and ended up finding a yard sale!  I found a book for AJ and a coach wallet and Adam found a rare Super Nintendo game!  I also got a pretty glass bowl for my mom.  After 9, we realized the shops probably weren't going to open until 10, so we decided  to head to the State Park to go horseback riding.

The bridge leading into the park

So pretty

Horses!  Well, horse butts

My house, Cash

Adam, riding Bonnie

Not exactly a cowgirl, but I can handle a horse!

The one picture I chanced taking while riding. A little blurry!

We got to be on one of the first trail rides of the day.  I mounted a horse named Cash and was immediately told that he need a firm hand, that he like to be lazy and let horses pass him. He then proceeded to rub on the fence until he got his bridle off of his ear!  I got nervous then! I wasn't sure he wanted me to ride him!  But once we got on the trail, he was pretty well mannered and I only had to urge him on a few times!  Adam's horse and the horse in front of me kept grabbing snacks from the nearby trees!  I thought it would be an easy, flat trail, but no!  We went uphill and downhill and it was fun!  And a workout, my legs muscles were a little sore!

After the horses we stopped at the winery and bought another bottle of wine to take home (we really liked it!) and then we spent a few hours stopping at flea markets along the road.  Adam found some things to resell and he found a new wallet he liked.  I also found my mom some of the knives she loves and Tyler a Turtles Bounce-on ball (what do you call those things?  With the handle, that you sit on and bounce around) and some little geodes.

On the way home, we stopped out our favorite restaurant for dinner and made one last detour.

The park (garden) where we got married

10 years ago, we said "I do" in that very spot

Love that man

It's been a great 10 year!

When we started getting close to home I was antsy to see my boys!  We had a great time but I missed them too!  Someday (when I don't have to worry about strollers or toddlers breaking things) we'll take them to Nashville too!  It wasn't the Hawaii trip we had dreamed of, but I couldn't have imagined a nicer trip to celebrate 10 years together!

A Ray of Sunshine!

Sweet Teresa at Where the *Bleep* is Our Stork nominated me for the Sunshine Award!  The award goes to those writers who's posts brighten the days of fellow bloggers/readers.  Aw, I am truly humbled! Thanks Teresa!!!  You're awesome!

Here are the rules:
1. Include the Sunshine Award icon in your post.
2. Link to the person who nominated you.
3. Answer 10 questions about yourself.
4. Nominate 10 bloggers to receive the award
5. Link your nominees and let them know they've been nominated.

Here are Teresa's questions:

1. Shaken or stirred? LOL Well I've never had a martini, but just based on gut reaction, I'll go with stirred.  It sounds more gentle than shaken.

2.  What is the greatest movie from the past year?  Hmm that's hard.  Was the Hunger Games in the past year?  I think so. I'll go with that.  Loved the books.

3.  Would you ever consider writing your own book?  Well, if you've read my blog,  you probably know the answer to that.  I can, I have, I am!  I actually wrote a pretty complete "novel", a fiction piece of questionable quality lol. I tend to be very dramatic in my writing, very life and death, etc.  Anyway it's probably crap and I will probably never do anything with it.  However, it's definitely a goal of mine to write something worth trying to get published and I have started an idea for a book of infertility stories.  I don't have much time to work on it these days, but it's still something I'm planning on getting back to.

4.  Would you rather have a dog's ears or hawks eyes?  Hmm good question!  Noises tend to distract me and my eyesight is terrible, so I'll say a hawks eyes. :)

5.  What is your favorite season and why?  Right now!  The Fall is my favorite.  I love the colors, I love the cool weather, I love how it smells, I just love everything about it!

6.  Have you ever hated loving someone?  You know what, I don't think so.  Even when it hurt, even when I knew I shouldn't, no, I don't think so.   I am a strong believer in being true to yourself and your feelings, that feelings are justified.  There were times that I knew it wasn't healthy, wasn't best for me to love the person I loved, but I either accepted that and dealt with it, or worked toward moving on.

7.  Do you have any strange habits?  Yes, doesn't everyone?  LOL  I'm actually doing mine right now.  When I am writing or typing, I have a habit of holding my mouth funny.  It's hard to describe, sometimes I'm kind of biting my lip, sometime I'm sort of tucking in my lip.  I'm not sure why I do it, but I know I look pretty dopey, so yeah, that's fun.

8.  Why do people say laughter is the best medicine?  Because if you can laugh, nothing is too bad!  Nothing is better than the feeling right after you've laughed so hard your sides ached or your eyes are watering.  Sick or hurt, sad or depressed, laughing will make you feel better, make things not seem so bad, even if just for a moment.

9.  What do you think is the color for happiness? Happiness...to me, happiness is warm, so I'd say something like a warm yellow or orange, like a sunset or like candlelight.

10.  What will you teach your children?  (what values, beliefs, hobbies, skills, etc)  I hope to teach my kids many things.  I want to teach them to be kind and try hard at everything they do.  I want to teach them to be respectful and honest.  I would love to work with them on any number of hobbies and skills.  I'm not very sporty, but I will do my best to teach them the basics and nurture that in them if they choose.  I hope to teach them to like to read and learn about new things, to not be afraid to try things, to enjoy music and being outside and oh so many things!

Great questions Teresa!!

Okay, so here are my nominees!  Some of these ladies are really in the trenches of infertility.  However, they always manage to hold on to hope, or to make me and all of their readers laugh at their ever-present humor, or to find joy in the little things in life.  I love reading their blogs, and so many more than are listed here.

1.  Rach at A Little Bit More
2.  Mrs E. at TTCBabyE3
3.  Stacy at Dancing My Way Through Love, Life and Books
4.  Tasha at Frozen OJ
5.  Hope at A Crack In Everything
6.  KelBel at Tales from Our Yellow Brick Road
7.  May at Nuts In May
8.  Liz at Wishing on a Snowflake
9.  Ready for My Turn
10.  And I'm going to follow Teresa's lead and leave this spot open for ANYONE!  If you read this, consider yourself nominated!  Be sure to leave a comment so I can read your answers!

Here are my questions!
1.  What is a quote that you live by or one the really resonates with you?
2.  What is your favorite word?
3.  What word or phrase do you overuse?
4.  What is one of your guilty pleasures?  It could be a food, a song, a movie, whatever.
5.  If your life was a movie, what would it be called and who would play you?
6.  You have tomorrow off work and you can do anything!  Money is no object!  What are you going to do?
7.  Your going on a 14 hour flight somewhere.  Name three MUST HAVES in your carry-on.
8.  What is the one thing you want people to remember about you?
9.  You can change your name tomorrow, no hassle. Would you and if so, to what?
10.  Fantasy pet (responsibilities, cost, and all realistic things aside)--What would it be and why?

Living Healthier Living

I've been making getting healthier a priority for almost two months now.  It's definitely challenging, but I know it will be worth it!  For the longest time, I have had nothing but excuses when it comes this subject.  I don't have time to exercise, I'm too picky to eat healthier, etc etc etc.  But I'm done with that.  So here's a few things I have been doing to get healthy:

Counting calories:  Yeah, I swore I'd never do this!  But I am.  I use My Fitness Pal and keep track of my calories throughout the day. That has meant some serious education about the foods I eat and what is in them!  I was amazed at how many calories can be in foods.  Even something as simple as salad dressing can be packed with calories.  These days, my goal is about 1200 calories.  That seems like next to nothing!  But most days, I do pretty well.  It's meant some pretty serious changes!  This includes buying lower cal and fat foods, cutting out most junk food, eating more fruits and veggies, and drinking more water.

Exercising:  This is a huge one for me.  And really tough.  I'm a working mom to two very active boys.  I have a house that needs cleaned, family and friends to see, errands to run, and much more in the limited "free time" hours.  So for ages, I used that as an excuse.  Now, I fit it in.  Usually, I don't get the chance until after the boys are sleeping, around 8:30 pm.  I know that isn't a great time to work out, but since it's what's available to me right now, I figure it's much much better than nothing!   At first, I just walked. I walked around our neighborhood in the evening.  After that, I jumped into the 30 Day Shred workout DVD.  I really enjoyed it, and completed about 16 days of it before my back issues sidelined me.  When my back started improving, I chose to ease back into my workouts by sticking to my elliptical trainer for awhile.  That's what I've been doing lately.  I plan on starting the Shred over at this point, possibly September 1.

My Elliptical Workout:
0:00-3:00 traditional "ellipticalling" (LOL new word)--I do NOT hold on to the handle bars when going forward.  Instead my arms are bent at the elbows, sort of a power walking motion.
3:00-4:00 biceps w/forward motion.  For this, I take hold of the handle bars and pull them to initiate the forward motion.
4:00-5:00 backward "ellipticalling" This works a different set of muscles, including the gluts.
5:00-6:00 triceps.  Same as biceps, but I push the handle bars instead of pulling them.
After this first set (6 minutes), I ratchet up the resistance.  My machine just has a dial, so I go up about half a turn.
6:00-12:00 Repeat cycle
12:00-15:00 forward
15:00-17:00 backwad
17:00-20:00 forward, lowering the resistance

Deprivation: I avoid this!!  I still eat out, it's just part of my lifestyle.  However, whenever possible, I look up the nutrition information for where I am going ahead of time so I can make a good choice.  I also find that I do better if I know what I am going to be having for dinner, which makes it much easier to budget my calories.  I'm still working on balancing things out so I can allow myself to snack when I am hungry.  I've been finding some great recipes for low cal snacks, like trail mix.  Other favorite meal accompaniments and snacks are watermelon, celery sticks, carrots sticks, raisins, salad with low cal dressing (I'm learning to love vinaigrette) and water with crystal light liquid added to it.  I still eat sweets and snack foods, but in strict moderation.  Last Saturday we went to Baskin Robbins.  Instead of the waffle cone, I opted for a dish and just one small scoop of my favorite flavor.  I followed it up later with a light dinner, making up the calories so I stayed on budget.  MFP allows you the option to eat your exercise calories, but I try my best to avoid that.  I even gave myself a true day off for the state fair, allowing myself to have what i wanted.  I didn't gorge myself, but I did indulge a bit!

I still check my weight more than I probably should, but I like to keep an eye on it.  My official weight in day in Monday, but sneak peeks tell me I have lost more than 10 lbs!  I feel good about that. 

Super Sweet Blogging Award

AW you guys!!! I've been nominated for a Super Sweet Blogging Award by the lovely Jennifer at It's Jennifer Juniper!

Here are the rules:

Thank the blogger who nominated you. Jennifer, thank you so much!  You totally made my day!  I've been writing here for many years, but I've never established a very large reader-ship, so I'm always tickled to get a comment, much less be nominated for an award like this!  You're a total sweetheart! You and Mr. Ru are so adorable and you're going to make amazing parents when your day arrives--I hope it's soon!

Answer 5 super sweet questions

Include the Super Sweet Blogging award image in the blog post

Nominate 12 other bloggers

Super Sweet Questions: 
1. Cookies or cake? I have to say cake!  It feels so much more SPECIAL to me than a cookie! :)
2. Chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate, no contest!
3. Favorite sweet treat? Mint chocolate chip ice cream in a waffle cone! YUM!
4. When do you crave sweet things the most? Evenings after dinner--soooo hard to resist! But I am doing better at that!  Back on the get-fit track!
5. Sweet nickname?  My hubby calls me "Sweet-Thing" sometimes. *blush* In his phone, my contact name is "Zsweet thing" so that I'm last in his contacts and easy to find (since the top is always voicemail, balance, etc)

And now, the 12 Super Sweet Blogs (in no particular order)!

1. Mrs. E at Ttcbabye3. This mama of twins (and one more on the way!) is a sweet commenter of mine!

2.  Leah at Single Infertile Female.  This amazing woman battled the most severe case of endo I have ever heard of and kept her head up through it all.  She is strong, independent, brave, and an AMAZING mom to a miracle baby from a truly touching and amazing story of pure chance and destiny!  She's also a phenomenal writer.  She wrote a book, you guys!  GO BUY IT HERE!  I've read it, it's amazing!!
3. Elizabeth at Bebe Suisse.  Another awesome writer and a super sweet mama currently days away from meeting her latest little one!  Such a sweet commenter and such a fun blog to read!

4.  KelBel at Tales from Our Yellow Brick Road.  Another follower, gotta love them! I always love her Wordless Wednesday posts, the pictures really give an awesome insight on her life!  She's an inspiring infertility survivor expecting sweet baby boy "Cinco"!

5. Mommy Someday at Waiting for Baby.  She is currently pregnant (YAY!) and is responsible for my June Blog challenge!  I'm a brand new follower but I'm loving it so far!

6.  Ready For My Turn at her blog of the same name! Such an inspiring blog, she's been through so much and she has never given up!  She is currently expecting TWINS!

7.  Cristy at Searching for our silver lining. Another amazing example of resilience and never giving up.  And she is another incredible success story I have had the joy to follow, pregnant with twins!

8.  Tasha at Frozen OJ first of all, her pun-day posts are HILARIOUS!  Second of all, she's everything a blogger should be, witty, honest, inspiring and a great writer!

9. SM at Unexplained Rantings.  Amazing changes coming for this amazing woman!  A baby boy on the way and they are opening their home and hearts to a pair of sisters beginning next week!  What a blessing!

10.  Liz at Wishing on a Snowflake.   Another path to motherhood, this one involving embryo adoption.  I love reading all different kinds of stories and this one was one that made me want to write my book.  She's a strong lady, much stronger than she knows!

11. Alissa at MissConception.  This is a blog I've followed for awhile.  She's very busy these days with her adorable son Cooper, but she writes and amazing blog and her story has brought me to tears.  She is so deserving of her little rainbow baby and this humble nominiation.

12.  Missohkay at the misadventures of missohkay.  This is another blog I have been following for a loooooong time.  She an adoption mommy of one of the most adorable little ladies ever!  She writes an awesome blog about her journey, her life, her daughter, etc etc etc!  Her story was one of the first I'd read about a journey to motherhood and a struggle with infertility and loss and it's extremely moving.

I know I haven't done justice to these little tidbits on the blogs of these amazing ladies, but they deserve much more than I can give with this little gesture.  They are awesome women!!!

Thank you!!!!

Thank you to all of my commenters and (hopefully) new readers!!! It was my first ICLW and it was awesome! I have so many new blogs on my reader now and even more amazing stories to follow. Its really inspiring me to get to work on my book! Hopefully AJ will allow me some time in the evenings sometimes! Again, thanks for reading and commenting and I hope you've come to stay!

Presenting....

BABY NUMBER TWO!!!

Okay, so it doesn't look like much.  But that black blob with the little tiny white blob at the top is my precious baby!  This ultrasound was taking at 6 weeks 2 days, and I'm currently 9 weeks 2 days!

So let's back up a little...as I've said before on this blog, we decided we wanted to start trying for another baby when my son was about 18 months.  We wanted our kids fairly close together and we were trying to be realistic that it might take a little while.  Of course we never imagined it would take 19 months.  As documented here, I had a miscarriage over the summer, followed by seeing a Reproductive Endocrinologist (who is totally awesome) and seeking out fertility treatments.  We did four rounds of the drug Clomid with no success.  In December, we chose to try another pill, Femara (Letrizole).  My doctor had suggested doing injections, but they aren't covered by my insurance, so we were planning to possibly try them in a few months, after tax returns and what-not.  Christmas didn't bring me what I'd hoped for and I went to my beginning of the month appointment at my RE's office feeling a little discouraged.  The nurse was very nice and she suggested we do a more monitored cycle, to include an ultrasound around the time of ovulation to check the size of my follicles, and possibly do a "trigger shot" to induce and enhance my ovulation.

We agreed, so off I went.  I took my femara days 3-7 and waited.  Cycle Day 13 (the day I'd gotten a positive ovulation test the month prior) I had the ultrasound done.  Two follicles, one 18 mm on the right and one 14 mm on the left.  Not a bad result, but they wanted me to wait until the next evening to do the shot.  The next night, I administered the injection (which was surprisingly easier than I'd expected) and then I went back to waiting.

The fun thing about an HCG trigger shot is that it is literally HCG, the pregnancy hormone, impersonating LH, the ovulation hormone.  That means that it will result in positive pregnancy tests, even though you are decidedly not pregnant yet.  So I had my fun, peeing on sticks and seeing two lines.  I diligently waited for the lines to disappear.  By day 11 there was a very faint line, but not too definitive.  D-day was day 14.  I got up and used a test, the best test out there, the only one I really trust.  And this is what I saw:

A bit of a squinter, but a line, nonetheless.  I called my RE's office, anxiously hoping this line was not the result of leftover HCG.  I went in and had my blood drawn.  I went to work.  I waited.

The call came.  HCG 12.7.  It's considered a gray area.  5 and above is pregnant, but with the trigger shot, there was still a very small possibility that this wasn't "real".  Come back Friday for another check, we want the levels to double.

Time dragged.  I took another test the next day and started to feel more confidant, the line was getting darker.

Friday finally came and my blood test showed an HCG level of 53!  It was real!  I was pregnant at last!  My progesterone level came back low at 9, despite the fact that I was already taking supplements.  Up went the dosage and down went the energy!  But I didn't care!  I was finally pregnant!

I spent the next week or so obsessing over lines on pregnancy tests.  I had my blood drawn one last time and the numbers were doing exactly what they should.  At last, I was instructed to make an appointment for an ultrasound.  When the day finally arrived, I lay on the table crying at the image from the "dildo cam".  A tiny blob within a blob.  A miniscule flicker within my tiny blob.  "Can you see it?" they asked and I wasn't sure.  They turned a knob and suddenly the room was filled with the most amazing sound of my tiny baby's heartbeat.  129 beats per minute, pronounced as "perfect".

More tears, hugs all around...goodbyes...they made me promise to bring the baby in to see them.   Celebration!

Once we had our ultrasound, we started to spread the news slowly.  We tried to deliver the news in person as much as possible.  We got Tyler a "Big Bro" T-shirt to surprise the family.  We made our official facebook announcement yesterday.  Tyler has dubbed the baby "Baby Whiff" after one of the trains on Thomas and Friends.  I can only hope he doesn't actually expect me to deliver a baby train!

I had my first OB appointment yesterday, but it went very badly...so I'll be having a second-first visit to an OB as soon as I can get my records sent over. *eye roll*

I'm feeling pretty good...very tired and a little dizzy from the progesterone supplements.  My stomach gets upset from time to time, especially if I don't eat pretty often.  I have quite a few symptoms, which I take as a good sign!  I am pretty happy that (SO FAR) I don't have horrible morning sickness like what I had with Tyler!

And so a long journey comes to an end!  I am a different person for experiencing this last year and half.  I've made tremendous friends that I will always love dearly.  We have shared joys and sorrows.  And now I prepare for one of the greatest joys I'll have in this life.  The arrival of my child in early October 2012.

I'm a lucky girl.

Scary Smart

I have come to the conclusion that my son is scary-smart.  Once he started to talk, he learned words so quickly!  He has known his alphabet for ages and is fairly good with counting too (he used to have something against the number 4, but he's over that now).  Here are a few more examples of his brilliance:

• We love to show off his smarts with a series of questions.  He can tell people his full name, how old he is, where he lives (City and state), what street he lives on, and his mommy and daddy's names.
• He loves to play with my husband's old basketball cards.  One day, he was handing them to Adam and asking "Who dis is?", so Adam told him each players name.  From that day forward, he began handing them to people and telling them who that card was.  I'm not kidding.  "Mookie Blaylock, Dennis Rodman, Dana Barrows, Hakeem Olajuwon (yeah, that one is funny to hear him say)".
• He has a crazy good memory.  He knows his schedule and he wants to stick to it, everything from when his favorite shows are on to which way to drive to certain stores and restaurants.  For example, there is a doughnut shop not far from my house and we have been there with Tyler ONE TIME.  And still, when we turn down that street, he asks to go there.
• Finally, he is a very technological child.  He got his hands on an IPad once and mastered it immediately.  On the few occasions where we've been desperate for something to occupy him, he has become a whiz at our cell phones.  He even plays with our old models (which we even charge so he can turn them on) and can do things that I couldn't figure out in 2 years of using the phone!  Plus, he loves to use the computer.  He knows where the bookmarks are and where his games are (he gets to play as a treat when he's been very good).  

That being said, my husband brought home an ancient laptop computer for him today.  It will play some of his educational computer games.  Needless to say, the child is in HEAVEN!  I had to snap a picture:

Forgive the somewhat evil expression, he was very excited.


He's going to be so much smarter than me, and I'm just thrilled about that.

Updates

So!  It was a busy week!  Work was crazy and abbreviated last week.  We thought Tyler had broken out with hives so that was scary and stressful.  He broke out into spots, but then they sort of disappeared.  We took him to the doctor and she suspected hives because they had faded.  However, they were back the next day.  The final conclusion was bug bites :(  It's a relief that it's not an allergy though!  He's doing much better now. 

I was a bridesmaid in my friend Mandy's wedding this weekend! Friday was the rehearsal dinner and it was a TON of fun!  I really like Nate and Mandy's friends and family!  We ate outside in the backyard and little did I know, I was becoming dinner too!  I have (at last count) 36 bug bites on my feet and legs!  I itch like crazy! 

The wedding was Saturday and it was beautiful!  It was really touching to see how in love Nate and Mandy are and how emotional it was for them.  It was wonderful!

Sunday was grocery and cleaning day, along with resting my high-heel sore feet and trying not to scratch my legs!

It was back to work today :-P time for month end and covering for someone on vacation. It's going to be a busy one before a 3 day weekend!

In the know

That title came to me randomly and I'm not confidant that it will become relevant as I write, but I like it and so that's that.  Basically, it fit my stream of consciousness/update type blog for today!

BULLET POINTS!  you know I love them....along with ellipses!  I have also noticed that I use a lot of exclamation points.  Anyway.

• Current obsession:  The Glee Project.  It's a reality show on Oxygen that is a competition to win a role on the show GLEE, which I love.  The kids on there are fantastic and I could actually see them all as a new Glee cast.  They are all extremely talented and although a few of them get on my nerves, they are also mostly completely endearing.  The songs are great!  
• Still on the TTC train, no news there...waiting to ovulated...CD 20 :-P hopefully tomorrow...I've never gotten a positive OPK later than CD 21.
• Took Tyler to the GI specialist today. They want to try a different medication for his constipation...hopefully it helps!
• I see my Reproductive Endocrinologist NEXT WEEK!  I can't wait, I really hope it goes well.
• I've been watching a new series called Switched at Birth.  There is a deaf character on the show and it has totally reawakened my desire to learn sign language.  On the Bucket List it goes!  
• It is REALLY HOT here right now. Like HOT .  Like 115 degrees with the heat index.  UGH.
• I've been slacking on my diet. I haven't really gained anything back, but I haven't lost in weeks.  Bad girl :( I need to get back to workouts
• I'm out of bullet points and it's time for Tyler's juice!  

Now you are in the know!  LOL

My Girls

Today I had lunch with my girls!  I have several really great friends and these three in particular form a tight knit group.  Here's your cast of characters:

Pam-I've known her the longest, we went to school together from kindergarten through high school.  Her dad and my mom also went to high school together.  Pam and I have been friends for almost 25 years, making her my oldest friend (outside of family).

Gabby-Gabby and I met in the 8th grade at an event for junior high students at the high school we would later attend.  We were both performing in the vocal division and we chatted outside and then ate lunch together.  We've been friends ever since!

Mandy-Mandy and I met in high school, through I can't be sure if we met in freshman year or not. I know we became friends later on.  See, we both had a crush on the same guy.  I ended up dating him for six months before he switched schools and sort of started ignoring me, then I dumped him.  She was very close friends with him throughout this, so she wasn't really a fan of mine :)  Later on, we did become friends and bonded over the romances that never really were.

We've always been a group.  This was really solidified in 12th grade British Literature class which was taught by one of my favorite teachers of all time, Mrs. Redding.  She split our class up into groups of four to work on projects (most notably, a comic book based on Beowulf).  Pam, Gabby, and Mandy were in a group with another friend of ours, but I was in a different group.  Their group was called "The Great Group of Gals".  I was an honorary member.  We've even gotten together a few times with our teacher since high school and to her, we'll always be the GGG.

Since high school, we've led more separate lives, but we have remained close.  Gabby and I went to the same college, but Mandy and Pam went elsewhere, but still in town.  We have always gotten the group together from time to time, celebrating birthdays or holidays, and more recently weddings and babies!

Which leads me to the following explanation of the pairing off of the Great Group of Gals.

In the spring of 2002, Gabby met Patrick.  The story goes that she met a guy on the internet and met Patrick through him (something like that, anyway).  They are pretty much perfect for each other.  That summer, in July, Gabby called me up to see if I might be interested in meeting a guy, a friend of Pat's.  I jumped at the chance, having been single for quite awhile.  So I was set up on a blind date.  And my blind date didn't know he was meeting me until 20 minutes before we met.  They only told him because he looked scruffy and they made him change!  That blind date changed my life.  It was on that date that I met my husband Adam.  We were engaged a year later and married the very next year.

Some time later, Gabby decided to try her match making skills for a second time. This time the lucky victim was Mandy. Mandy is a reptile enthusiast and Gabby just happened to know another!  She connected Mandy with Nate.  They've been together ever since and they will be married in August!

Fast forward to the summer of 2010.  On the Fourth of July, Pam spent some time with another friend of Gabby and Pat's, a guy named Cliff.  They had met at other G&P functions, but last years Fourth of July sealed the deal and they've been a couple since then and are going strong!

This is us on the night of our 10th high school reunion.  I'm on the left, followed by Mandy, Pam, and Gabby.

Pretty unbelievable story, huh?  It pays to stay in touch with those high school girlfriends!  I love these girls!  They are all so funny and we have the best time laughing together.  Pam is so kind and sincere.  Mandy is fun-loving and feisty.  And Gabby is sensitive and sweet.  They are some of the best friends a girl could ask for!

Staycation

Adam and I took this week off work.  Today was a holiday at my office and he was scheduled to have Friday off, so we only had to take 4 days off, so we took advantage of the short week.  We haven't done too much, officially.   And yet, we've done a lot!

• I'm with yet another cell phone company!  I was with AT&T for less than a week.  They neglected to tell us how smartphones work, leading us to go over our data usage plans in just 3 days!  Two crappy go-rounds with customer service and four calls to the person I signed up with that were ignored led me to cancel.  Now I'm with Verizon, the preferred provider of the company I work for.  They are a little more expensive, even with my corporate discount, but I have heard lots of good things about them. I really like the phone, so I have my fingers crossed that the other shoe does not drop!  Unlimited data is bliss.
• I'm pretty proud of myself diet-wise this week.  I've managed several good workouts and I have done really well about not snacking on junk while I'm at home.  I have been eating a lot of salad and raw veggies.  I've indulged a bit here and there, but I think I've done great for being home and mere steps from the kitchen most of the week.  I have lost about 4 lbs so far, slow going, but it's progress.  Thanks always to Darcy!  And thanks to my facebook fitness group, just reading about others struggling with this gives me motivation.
• My new office should be set up with furniture when I get to work Monday! It was a rough 2 1/2 weeks of living out of boxes and moving from place to place, but I'm excited that I will finally have a workspace WITH a door!
• Visited the local Zoo this week.  The crowds sucked, but I did see an ENORMOUS porcupine, which was totally awesome.
• We also visited the park.  Tyler LOVES the park...it's absolutely priceless.  And a workout for me!

I'm out of bullet points!   Thanks always for reading! :)

Two True?

Tomorrow my darling little boy, my baby, is turning two years old. The time goes way too fast. The way I feel about him is beyond words. He's a part of me which is more amazing that I ever dreamed. The amount of love a mother has for her child is indescribable. I never considered how much being a mom would change the way I see the world. I see a new baby with its mother and I smile. I hear an awful story of a baby hurt or sick and I want to cry. I must tell Tyler that I love him on average of 20 times a day. He learned to hug (really hug, squeezing) this week and I can't get enough! He's so smart and so adorable. And tomorrow he'll be two. I feel proud and thrilled and sad.

I always knew this was an age I looked forward to...old enough to walk and communicate and learn. I dread the day it's not so cool to hug and kiss Mommy. I pray that day will never come!

So Happy Birthday to my sweet Tyler-Man. I love you, buddy!

Make A Wish

Today and tomorrow is the annual Make A Wish Request-a-thon for WZPL Z99.5 radio station. Make-a-wish is an awesome organization that grants wishes for kids with life-threatening illnesses.

Times are tough, but you can donate a lot or a little. You can spread it over a year. But if you can afford it, please consider donating. It's a great cause. No child should have to go through and know about what these kids do. To be able to make a dream come true for them while there is still time is indescribable.

I don't have a big reader-ship, so if you stumble on this, it'd be great if you'd pass it on.

Edible Monkey

I could just eat him up!

So...Halloween Edition

So I'm back...again...some more. Been a little busy for the last little while. Tyler is 9 months old and a great big time suck of awesomeness. He's so much more fun now that colic is over and he can (and chooses to) amuse himself sometimes. See cuteness:




And I've decided I still like blogging. I just wish I could get people to read...how do you do that?

So here goes.

Today at work we had the option of wearing Halloween costumes. I love stuff like that. I like to dress up in costume. I don't know why, really. Maybe it has to do with my background in theater. Maybe it's an attention thing, whatever. It's fun. I loved it in grade school, during Spirit week. We'd have a Red, White, and Blue day (Go Rebels!), a "Come as you are" PJ day. There was funny hat day and hippie day. I loved it all. Pj day was especially awesome from a comfort standpoint.

So anyway, today. I did a quick poll at work to make sure I wouldn't be the only person participating. I'm a bit of a follower that way. Assured that at least a few people were dressing up too, I scoured my house looking for my costume. I decided to resurrect a costume I used as a skating costume years ago. My aunt made it for a routine I did to "Reflections" from the Disney Movie, Mulan. It's a short kimono robe, black with red roses. I knew where it was, because I've used it as a robe on occasion. But I also had a gold obi belt. And I wasn't 100% sure I knew where that was. Well, I knew it was with my skating costumes, but I wasn't sure where they were either. So I looked in our shed, but I didn't see the container I thought it was in. I looked in our garage. I looked in our attic. I ended up back in our shed, where with the help of my mom and sister, we basically emptied it out.

On a side note, when we opened the shed doors, we found a wooly worm. In case you don't know, they look like this:



Cute right? I thought so. So we scoured the shed and finally found the box we needed. All the way in the back, the very last box in the shed.

And it was COVERED in ladybugs.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid of bugs, really. If they can bite or sting me, I don't like 'em and I might get a little twitch if one buzzes my ear or something. Also if they bite or sting and try to touch me, I kill them. But if they are docile buggies, I simply ignore them. If they find themselves trapped in my house, I scoop them into a cup or something and put them outside. I've recently done this with three or four ladybugs that have shown up in my bed (the hell?). But a hundred or so bug of any kind freaks my shit out, mmkay? So I'm getting all gacked out and using one of those gopher claw things to remove each item from the box one by one. Finally found the sash and after a few shrieks from stray bugs crawling up my leg and a lot of itching that made me feel like they were crawling on me, we repacked the shed and headed out. But Mr. Wool E. Wurm was still hanging out on the inside of the door, but now he's moseyed his way to the very top, where if I had closed the door, I'd squish him. Mr. Wurm was cute and fuzzy and let me pet his back, so I didn't want to squish him. So here we were, three grown women in a dark yard, with flashlights, trying to convince a worm to go on his merry way so we could close the door. And it was starting to rain. Eventually, our cajoling caused him to fall off the door. Then he curled into a ball and did the roly-poly thing. So we left him alone.

Fun times. And you know what? I went looking for that worm today. He's gone of course, but I looked just the same.

My public insists

So I'm back. Yeah, it's been almost a year. But my adoring public insists that I should resurrect this blog. My adoring public is my twin sister, probably the only one to ever read this, but most of the time I'll pretend that others might stumble upon it. So I re-read some of my old posts and decided they were kinda funny. So why not? Maybe I won't right anything worth reading, but so what?

So updates. The biggest one is that I'm about 6 months preggers. It's the weirdest, best, worst experience of my life. I was less than 5 weeks pregnant when morning sickness started and I still get it if I even think about not taking the RX drug that keeps it somewhat at bay. At best, it's tolerable nausea and no appetite. I'm suddenly a complete vegetarian. I can't eat meat or eggs. The only caffeine I indulge in is the occasional frozen coke (okay a little more than occasional. They are my first official craving), or a little chocolate. I lost more than 15 lbs during the first part of my pregnancy. I've since gained back 7 lbs. At one point, I was sleeping 10 or 11 hours a night and was still tired in the morning!

It's also super cool. I'm having tons of fun picking out things and planning the new baby's room. This will be a boy, his name will be Tyler Nicholas. And he's just starting to make his presence known by little kicks and jabs. WEIRD! He pops around a few times a day for a few minutes at a time around my belly button. It feels strange!

That's the most consuming part of my life currently. I'm sure it might lend itself to some interesting blogs. We shall see!

Thanksgiving Survey

Thanksgiving Survey

My laziness knows no bounds. Hell with it.

How intensely do you celebrate Thanksgiving, on a 1-10 scale?
Well we have been pretty low key the last few years and even more so this year, but we kick it in the food department, so i guess an 8?

1. What is your favorite part of Thanksgiving?
eating all day without feeling bad about it

2. Do you eat Turkey? What foods are on your table every year?
Actually, no, I don't. It's a texture thing. I've never liked it. I concentrate on the veggies, rolls, mashed potatoes and of course pumpkin pie

3. What are your Thanksgiving traditions, is there something you do every year?
Dinner somewhere. This year it's here. My immediate family usually spends the day together, watching a movie, helping with the meal, etc.

4. Do you watch the Macy's Day Parade?
not really

5. What are you thankful for?
My family and friends, my pets, Adam, my "health", my job I don't hate, and my new house etc.

6. Do you go shopping on Black Friday -the next day?
I tried last year. crowds make me crazy. I'd venture out if there was something I had to have, but usually I steer clear. I'll have to do that enough once I have kids that want the toy of the year.

7. Do you celebrate Buy Nothing Day?
Yes

8. Do you watch football at home?
Not really, but the Colts are playing tonight, so Adam will have it one.

9. Do you have a favorite Thanksgiving Memory?
Nothing specific. Mostly going to my grandparents. It was always the same, a good meal, playing with my cousins (I remember a lot of glasses fogging up cause we went in and out of the cold), someone getting in a fight with someone, that kind of thing

10. It's not Thanksgiving without...
family

11. What will be different about this Thanksgiving?
It's the first year since my parents divorce. That'll be really different.

Scary Survey

Scariest Survey EVER

Would you rather...

1.) Be able to comsume fatty foods without gaining weight OR be able to have unprotected sex without getting sexual diseases?

Ew. BLTs not STDs.

2.) Be able to communicate with animals, but only the nerds OR be able to read people's minds but only when they are thinking about aluminum siding topics and issues?

Easy. Animals. I've always been considered a nerd.

3.) Have a knack for model train set-ups but have an irresistible urge to punch people named Mildred in the breast and thighs OR be able to make anything shiny but be unable to refrain from making the tug boat gesture and sound any time an overweight person enters a room?

Number one, since I don’t know anyone named Mildred, and if I did, they might deserve it.--WORD

4.) During sex, be able to read the mind of the person you are having sex with OR be able to hit you or your partner's G-spot by finding Waldo in a Where's Waldo book? (each page used only once)

The mind reading thing encompasses both, n'est pas? Sorry I'm on a french kick. Use it or lose it. It means, "Is is not?"

5.)Every hour on the hour, change which gender you are attracted to OR turn your sexual partner into Tony Danza when you climax, and then turn them back to themselves the next time you have sex with them?

I'm not that okay with either one, since I happen to be straight. However, I'm fine with alternative lifestyles and not so fine with creppy old guys, so we'll go with A.


6.)Have your mom have to put on your condom like she was dressing you as a child OR never be able to call your spouse by the same name twice?

MMkkay Mom and condom should never appear in the same sentence, so I have no choice but to go with B.

7.)Have to use condoms that come in a wrapper where you have to finish the crossword puzzle before it can be opened OR be unable to shake the image of Meadowlark Lemon during all sexual congress?

The puzzle would be part of the fun! Plus, I'm married. I technically don't have to use a condom. And, there are other forms of bc if I got tired of puzzles


8.) Never be able to experience orgasm OR perpetually experience orgasm?

B hands down.

9.) Attract swarms of fireflies when aroused OR have the sound of microphone feedback intermittently emanating from your crotch?

LMAO, I can't say it better, twin: Feedback from my crotch would be hilarious.


10.) Your penis/breasts increase in size by 10 percent each year OR decrease in size by 2 percent each year?

Crap that's hard. I would hate to be bigger chested, but Adam's a boob man. I guess B, since it's only 2% a year. He'd get to enjoy them until they started sagging anyways.

11.) Vicariously experience all orgasms that occur in your zip code OR during sex, have the Microsoft paper clip help icon appear with sex tips?

MS Help blows but I have to work sometime Option B.

12.) Have Bettie Davis eyes OR Charles Manson eyes?

Ew A.

13.) Be able to simulate the voice of anybody you meet OR simulate the hair?

I could make serious bank by simulating voices. I’ll take it. AGAIN I SAY WORD!

14.) Be able to achieve orgasm at will OR be able to make anyone other than yourself achieve orgasm at your will?

Others, how cool would that be? "Ding! You can thank me later." This was the last person’s answer, but I couldn’t change it. Perfect. I will have to second that earlier response. Although I was going to be totally selfish.

15.) Have taste buds all over your body OR have a malleable stress-ball head?

Stress ball head. I love those things!!!

16.)Have an ever-changing tattoo that takes the form of whatever image you will it be OR be able to psychically see anybody's internet browser history when looking at them?

Changing tattoo would rock!

17.) Have Gatorade saliva OR be able to murmur fluently in twelve languages?

me no likey gatorade. Beaucoup de culture!!!

18.) Be able to insist on paying for the check but never actually get stuck with it OR know exactly what the person on the other end of the phone looks like simply by hearing their voice?

The first one. :)

19.) Slide naked down a fire man's pole covered with tacks into a pool of scotch OR cheese-grate the skin off your left forearm

The second, but I’m weeping for either.

20.) Chew a used condom as gum for an hour OR have all your pubic hairs become ingrown? GAH!!! I think i have to say...oh crap man. B I guess but GAWD!

21.) Sleep a night on a bed of peanut butter OR next to a humidifier full of urine?

Peanut butter. What sick bastard wrote this survey.

22.) Have invisible skin OR see in strobe light?

See in strobe light. Then I could just gouge my eyes out. --Word. The only option.

23.) Have an intense urge to whisper sweet nothings into the ears of bus drivers as you pay your fare OR have parents who affectionately refer to you as "anal cakes"? Ew. I'm walking. A.

24.) Have permanent Cheetoh residue on your fingertips OR appear as Shemp of the three stooges in all photographs?
Cheetoh residue, as long as it didn’t get on my clothes or others. AGREED

25.) Have commercial interruptions during masturbation fantasies OR have to masturbate with the mandatory use of a Sesame Street's Elmo hand puppet?

It would be A, because I refuse to violate my childhood. AGAIN, I must concur.

Would your rather your only porn be......
1.) 6 second clips of hot people OR 2 minute clips of moderately attractive people? 2 minutes. I can’t get anything done in 6 seconds.
2.) Verbose, subtle erotic fiction OR pornographic Magic Eye 3D pictures? The first one. (Am I really going to post this in my blog?!)
3.) Animal Nature documentaries OR suggestive cloud formations? Cloud formations are much more fun.
4.) Geometric shapes OR family reunion pictures? SHAPES. No family EVER.
Again, I can't do better than this.

Would you rather live in a world....
1.) Where women were given equal pay, opportunity, and access to jobs OR where men experience the pains of the birth process along with women?

That's so hard. Can't I have B, just for one day??? My wallet says A.

2.) Where there was a rapper-like East Coast/West Coast feud of mimes OR where the pledge of allegiance was changed to the lyrics to "Eye of the Tiger"?

Stupid. A.

3.) Where Teletubbies were a common species of creature that lived in the wild OR where there were evil, bizzaro arch-enemy versions of ourselves?

I think Teletubbies scare me more than enemy-types.

4.) Where the convention of singing "Happy Birthday" was replaced with "You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet" by Bachman Turner Overdrive OR where congressional debate was settled by dodgeball contests?

Dodgeball! Helltotheyeah!!

5.) Without skin moisturizer OR without cream cheese?

Cream cheese. I have really dry skin.

(Guys) Would you rather have sex with....
1.) Hillary Clinton OR Natalie from Facts of Life? (This doesn’t apply to me, but Natalie. At least she was my age-ish.)
2.) Jessica Rabbit OR Daphne from Scooby Doo? (Duh, Jessica Rabbit.)
3.) Venus Williams OR Sheryl Crow if she spoke in the voice of an old Jewish man? (Sheryl Crow, I’d tape her mouth shut.) WoRD

Ladies...Would you rather have sex with...
1.) Bryant Gumble OR Weird Al Yankovic?

Bryant Gumble. Al might creep me out in that sitch.

2.) Alex Trebec OR Larry David?

That's sad. I don't know who Larry David is.

3.) Johnny Depp without a leg OR Tom Selleck without a moustache?

DUH Johnny's a hottie with a body, legs or no legs.

Immoral Dilemmas
1.) You are walking down the street and see an open briefcase with $1,000 in it. Across the street there is a police station. Do you spend it on whores or crack?

Stupid. I want neither drugs nor whores.

2.) You're driving at night and hit a dog. No one witnesses you hitting the dog. Do you bake or broil it?

This section sucks. I would cry

3.) You're waiting at a red light at 4 am. There isn't a car in sight. No one would see if you ran the light. Do you masturbate with your left or right hand?

Wha?! Wait ‘til I got home, Mr. Icky Survey! (ROTFLMAO I can't change that.)

Oh I need a shower after that. So sorry, but it was long so I can't not post it.