Wednesday, March 7, 2012



Okay, so it doesn't look like much.  But that black blob with the little tiny white blob at the top is my precious baby!  This ultrasound was taking at 6 weeks 2 days, and I'm currently 9 weeks 2 days!

So let's back up a I've said before on this blog, we decided we wanted to start trying for another baby when my son was about 18 months.  We wanted our kids fairly close together and we were trying to be realistic that it might take a little while.  Of course we never imagined it would take 19 months.  As documented here, I had a miscarriage over the summer, followed by seeing a Reproductive Endocrinologist (who is totally awesome) and seeking out fertility treatments.  We did four rounds of the drug Clomid with no success.  In December, we chose to try another pill, Femara (Letrizole).  My doctor had suggested doing injections, but they aren't covered by my insurance, so we were planning to possibly try them in a few months, after tax returns and what-not.  Christmas didn't bring me what I'd hoped for and I went to my beginning of the month appointment at my RE's office feeling a little discouraged.  The nurse was very nice and she suggested we do a more monitored cycle, to include an ultrasound around the time of ovulation to check the size of my follicles, and possibly do a "trigger shot" to induce and enhance my ovulation.

We agreed, so off I went.  I took my femara days 3-7 and waited.  Cycle Day 13 (the day I'd gotten a positive ovulation test the month prior) I had the ultrasound done.  Two follicles, one 18 mm on the right and one 14 mm on the left.  Not a bad result, but they wanted me to wait until the next evening to do the shot.  The next night, I administered the injection (which was surprisingly easier than I'd expected) and then I went back to waiting.

The fun thing about an HCG trigger shot is that it is literally HCG, the pregnancy hormone, impersonating LH, the ovulation hormone.  That means that it will result in positive pregnancy tests, even though you are decidedly not pregnant yet.  So I had my fun, peeing on sticks and seeing two lines.  I diligently waited for the lines to disappear.  By day 11 there was a very faint line, but not too definitive.  D-day was day 14.  I got up and used a test, the best test out there, the only one I really trust.  And this is what I saw:
A bit of a squinter, but a line, nonetheless.  I called my RE's office, anxiously hoping this line was not the result of leftover HCG.  I went in and had my blood drawn.  I went to work.  I waited.

The call came.  HCG 12.7.  It's considered a gray area.  5 and above is pregnant, but with the trigger shot, there was still a very small possibility that this wasn't "real".  Come back Friday for another check, we want the levels to double.

Time dragged.  I took another test the next day and started to feel more confidant, the line was getting darker.

Friday finally came and my blood test showed an HCG level of 53!  It was real!  I was pregnant at last!  My progesterone level came back low at 9, despite the fact that I was already taking supplements.  Up went the dosage and down went the energy!  But I didn't care!  I was finally pregnant!

I spent the next week or so obsessing over lines on pregnancy tests.  I had my blood drawn one last time and the numbers were doing exactly what they should.  At last, I was instructed to make an appointment for an ultrasound.  When the day finally arrived, I lay on the table crying at the image from the "dildo cam".  A tiny blob within a blob.  A miniscule flicker within my tiny blob.  "Can you see it?" they asked and I wasn't sure.  They turned a knob and suddenly the room was filled with the most amazing sound of my tiny baby's heartbeat.  129 beats per minute, pronounced as "perfect".

More tears, hugs all around...goodbyes...they made me promise to bring the baby in to see them.   Celebration!

Once we had our ultrasound, we started to spread the news slowly.  We tried to deliver the news in person as much as possible.  We got Tyler a "Big Bro" T-shirt to surprise the family.  We made our official facebook announcement yesterday.  Tyler has dubbed the baby "Baby Whiff" after one of the trains on Thomas and Friends.  I can only hope he doesn't actually expect me to deliver a baby train!

I had my first OB appointment yesterday, but it went very I'll be having a second-first visit to an OB as soon as I can get my records sent over. *eye roll*

I'm feeling pretty good...very tired and a little dizzy from the progesterone supplements.  My stomach gets upset from time to time, especially if I don't eat pretty often.  I have quite a few symptoms, which I take as a good sign!  I am pretty happy that (SO FAR) I don't have horrible morning sickness like what I had with Tyler!

And so a long journey comes to an end!  I am a different person for experiencing this last year and half.  I've made tremendous friends that I will always love dearly.  We have shared joys and sorrows.  And now I prepare for one of the greatest joys I'll have in this life.  The arrival of my child in early October 2012.

I'm a lucky girl.