One year ago today I found out I was pregnant. The nineteen months prior had been some of the most trying and frustrating I've known. However, that time brought me some amazing friends and I learned a lot about myself. Now I look at AJ, at 3 1/2 months and it's somehow hard to imagine when he wasn't a part of my life. It's hard, the newborn age is harder for me than I like to admit, but every time he smiles I'm reminded about how much I wanted him.
A part of me feels guilty sometimes, because I do remember how hard it was when we weren't getting pregnant. I have friends that were trying at the same time as we were, some even before we were and they still don't have their babies yet. And I feel horrible for them. They are some of the most wonderful, warm, caring people I know. Why me and not them?
It is still hard for me to believe that I am a mom to two boys. Tyler is getting so big, he'll be FOUR in just days, but I'll save that for the next post. AJ is already astounding me with his voice and his newly discovered hands and all they can do. In some ways he is so like Tyler but in others he is completely different. As much as Tyler talks now, he wasn't nearly as vocal as AJ is. He coos, he jabbers, and sometimes he just YELLS!
His hair is darker than Tyler's, very like his daddy's, although it's pretty thin at the moment, thanks to a monster case of cradle cap we can't quite seem to get rid of. He likes to grasp toys, bat at his brother, and watch his mobile. He likes his bottle, his paci, and being bounced on a knee. He likes to chew his fists a lot! His eyes get huge when he is startled and he LOVES to get undressed! Sometimes if he's crying we can get a break just by laying him on his changing table! His chin still wobbles sometimes and we aren't ever sure why! He kicks off blankets, especially in the grocery store with Gaga. He already like to watch shows with his big brother, especially Word World and Sid the Science Kid.
And here are a few photo collages I had fun creating the other day, including some shots of AJ. Just look at how similar he and Tyler are!