Twin Talk 2

Another example of how my twin sister cracks me up:

Actually, I should preface this story with an explanation. Wait, how about a riddle, followed by an explanation? Yes? Excellent…

My sister and I are twins. She is three minutes older than me, but I am three weeks older than her. How is that possible?

Answer: We were literally conceived at two different times. Typically, fraternal twins like us are conceived from two separate eggs released at the same time. However, our mother actually ovulated two different times in a month. I was conceived first and Angie was conceived about three weeks later. She was actually born first, making her three minutes “older” than me, at least to the outside world. The reason we know this is that my sister was proclaimed several weeks premature. We also varied in weight more than most twins do, she was 5 lbs 5 oz and I was 6 lbs 2 oz (I think).

So! On to the funny…

I posted a mini-survey thing on my facebook page and one of the questions was “What is your first memory of me?” Here is my sister’s response:

My first memory of you. "Sweet, I'm gonna be a human! Let's settle into the Chateau de Uterus... Hi... I wasn't aware that I'd be sharing this place. And you've already made yourself comfortable! Fantastic. Scoot over, I'm still staying."

Upon reading this, I emailed her:

Me: I'm an literally LOLing at work!

Angie: I thought that might make you laugh. :-D

Me: LMAO and what was I saying to the sudden invasion? Man I loves you!

Angie: I loves you, too!

And I thought of that. Here's you,

"Man, it is tiring splitting all these cells! It's time for a na--Hello? Is that the pizza I ordered? Good lord, you're tiny! What do you mean room-mate? There was nothing in the lease about a room-mate, just 9 months, then eviction. Oh god, FINE. You can stay. That half. No, that half. No, your parts are in my half, MOVE. Oh, this is gonna suck."

Me: I'm doing something way beyond ROTFLMFAO right now. Seriously. I'm starting a file of things like this you say. Someday I'll publish it or something.

Angie: I want some of the money.

Me: LOL we'll talk. Just kidding, agreed. I feel like it needs to be followed up with a dialogue of me "kicking you out".

Angie: This is true. Hmmm.

I am beginning to consider tape recording all of our conversations. I can’t make this stuff up.