Presenting....

BABY NUMBER TWO!!!

Okay, so it doesn't look like much.  But that black blob with the little tiny white blob at the top is my precious baby!  This ultrasound was taking at 6 weeks 2 days, and I'm currently 9 weeks 2 days!

So let's back up a little...as I've said before on this blog, we decided we wanted to start trying for another baby when my son was about 18 months.  We wanted our kids fairly close together and we were trying to be realistic that it might take a little while.  Of course we never imagined it would take 19 months.  As documented here, I had a miscarriage over the summer, followed by seeing a Reproductive Endocrinologist (who is totally awesome) and seeking out fertility treatments.  We did four rounds of the drug Clomid with no success.  In December, we chose to try another pill, Femara (Letrizole).  My doctor had suggested doing injections, but they aren't covered by my insurance, so we were planning to possibly try them in a few months, after tax returns and what-not.  Christmas didn't bring me what I'd hoped for and I went to my beginning of the month appointment at my RE's office feeling a little discouraged.  The nurse was very nice and she suggested we do a more monitored cycle, to include an ultrasound around the time of ovulation to check the size of my follicles, and possibly do a "trigger shot" to induce and enhance my ovulation.

We agreed, so off I went.  I took my femara days 3-7 and waited.  Cycle Day 13 (the day I'd gotten a positive ovulation test the month prior) I had the ultrasound done.  Two follicles, one 18 mm on the right and one 14 mm on the left.  Not a bad result, but they wanted me to wait until the next evening to do the shot.  The next night, I administered the injection (which was surprisingly easier than I'd expected) and then I went back to waiting.

The fun thing about an HCG trigger shot is that it is literally HCG, the pregnancy hormone, impersonating LH, the ovulation hormone.  That means that it will result in positive pregnancy tests, even though you are decidedly not pregnant yet.  So I had my fun, peeing on sticks and seeing two lines.  I diligently waited for the lines to disappear.  By day 11 there was a very faint line, but not too definitive.  D-day was day 14.  I got up and used a test, the best test out there, the only one I really trust.  And this is what I saw:

A bit of a squinter, but a line, nonetheless.  I called my RE's office, anxiously hoping this line was not the result of leftover HCG.  I went in and had my blood drawn.  I went to work.  I waited.

The call came.  HCG 12.7.  It's considered a gray area.  5 and above is pregnant, but with the trigger shot, there was still a very small possibility that this wasn't "real".  Come back Friday for another check, we want the levels to double.

Time dragged.  I took another test the next day and started to feel more confidant, the line was getting darker.

Friday finally came and my blood test showed an HCG level of 53!  It was real!  I was pregnant at last!  My progesterone level came back low at 9, despite the fact that I was already taking supplements.  Up went the dosage and down went the energy!  But I didn't care!  I was finally pregnant!

I spent the next week or so obsessing over lines on pregnancy tests.  I had my blood drawn one last time and the numbers were doing exactly what they should.  At last, I was instructed to make an appointment for an ultrasound.  When the day finally arrived, I lay on the table crying at the image from the "dildo cam".  A tiny blob within a blob.  A miniscule flicker within my tiny blob.  "Can you see it?" they asked and I wasn't sure.  They turned a knob and suddenly the room was filled with the most amazing sound of my tiny baby's heartbeat.  129 beats per minute, pronounced as "perfect".

More tears, hugs all around...goodbyes...they made me promise to bring the baby in to see them.   Celebration!

Once we had our ultrasound, we started to spread the news slowly.  We tried to deliver the news in person as much as possible.  We got Tyler a "Big Bro" T-shirt to surprise the family.  We made our official facebook announcement yesterday.  Tyler has dubbed the baby "Baby Whiff" after one of the trains on Thomas and Friends.  I can only hope he doesn't actually expect me to deliver a baby train!

I had my first OB appointment yesterday, but it went very badly...so I'll be having a second-first visit to an OB as soon as I can get my records sent over. *eye roll*

I'm feeling pretty good...very tired and a little dizzy from the progesterone supplements.  My stomach gets upset from time to time, especially if I don't eat pretty often.  I have quite a few symptoms, which I take as a good sign!  I am pretty happy that (SO FAR) I don't have horrible morning sickness like what I had with Tyler!

And so a long journey comes to an end!  I am a different person for experiencing this last year and half.  I've made tremendous friends that I will always love dearly.  We have shared joys and sorrows.  And now I prepare for one of the greatest joys I'll have in this life.  The arrival of my child in early October 2012.

I'm a lucky girl.

Ta-Ta 2011

As 2011 draws to a close I, like many others, reflect on it's events.  In most ways, it wasn't a very eventful year.  I work at the same job as I did this time last year.  Our financial situation is better (at a cost), so that's going in the positive column.  My family has remained intact, another positive.  My friends are happy and healthy.  I gained an honorary nephew and the promise of my first niece next April.  I've made new friends and strengthened friendships with old friends.  I celebrated two new marriages. I've watched my son grow day after day, amazing me along the way.

There were a few negatives of course.  Much of the year was spent trying to add to our family.  Easily the low point was my miscarriage in June.  But for the most part, I've been lucky this year.  My losses were few and my gains were sweet.

All in all, it seems like it was a year of promise.  Promises of good things to come.  It was a year of growth and learning. I learned a lot about myself.  I'm stronger than I knew. 

2012.  I like the sound of it, if for no other reason than I prefer even numbers.  Yes, I'm a little strange that way.  I chose to go into the year with hope and goals. Of course, I would like to have anther child this year.  I would like to (again) try to get healthier.  I'd like to do some thinking about what I want from my life.

So here's to 2012.  I hope that all of you that are reading have a great year ahead of you.  And now, if you'll excuse me, I have a cocktail, a husband, and a night of relaxation ahead of me.  Happy New Year!

Christmas Rush

I always feel like it starts just after Thanksgiving.  It's easily my busiest month at work.  Add that to family functions, holiday parties, doctor's appointments, and of course Christmas shopping and I am a BUSY girl!  My husband and I were both down with strep throat last week, so I'm playing catch up in a pretty major way.

We got Tyler's tests results back, FINALLY. I had to call to get them about 2 weeks ago and call again yesterday to get the letter I should have gotten ages ago.  Long story short, his tests were normal, although they did note a few episodes of acid reflux.  They didn't suggest any new treatments, stopping treatments or even setting up a follow up appointment.  I've lost all respect for that office.  He has an appointment with the doctor that our PCP wanted him to see originally (We went elsewhere because the wait for an appointment was several months) in January.  Perhaps things are as good as they can be, but I want to be sure.

Thanksgiving didn't bring us the BFP I was hoping for, so now I've started my first round of femara.  I'm trying not to focus on it too much this month.  Ha, we'll see how that goes. 

Aside from that, Tyler is SUPER excited about Christmas!  We put up the tree Sunday and my mom and I even made our own new tree skirt.  I think it will be a very fun Christmas!

Keep on Keeping On

Seems to be the name of the game these days!  I don't have a lot of news to write about.  It's a busy time at work, we've been passing around a cold at my house, and my sister moved into her own apartment.  Christmas is coming and I'm starting to feel like I have a LOT to do! 

Still no results from Tyler's doctor.  I think I mentioned that the whole experience was pretty frustrating so I suppose I'm not surprise.  I will give them a call on Monday.  It's been two weeks, so we should have heard something by now.

We're still trying to get pregnant.  I am on my final round of clomid.  My doctor recommended trying injections if we don't get pregnant this month, but unfortunately, I found out they are not covered by my insurance.  The medication alone will cost $500-800.  It's not something we can afford right now.  So it looks like we'll try another pill, femara.  It's similar to Clomid, but it affects a different part of the brain. The success rate is about the same as Clomid, but I figure it's better than doing nothing.

Thanksgiving is next week, so it'll be a short 3 day week at work!  I'm looking forward to time with family and time off work!  There should be more 3 day work weeks!

Through the rough

Boy am I glad this week is over!  Tyler had his endoscopy and reflux study Thursday.  He did GREAT...until he woke up afterward.  Then he was understandably scared and wanted nothing more to do with any of the equipment or staff.  He had a tube in his nose that was attached to the probe he'd have to wear for 24 hours. He hated it, I hated it.  But we got through it.  He was such a brave little guy and I was so proud of him.

The experience sucked over all.  The doctor was being an ass and the nurses hadn't explained the procedure clearly when it was scheduled. We were totally unprepared with all it entailed. Several times we were given contradictory information or told something that then ended up not correct.  All in all, I'm glad it's over. We don't have results yet but I won't be taking Tyler back to that doctor.

It was also Halloween this week.  Tyler had a lot of fun trick or treating.  He went as Thomas the Tank Engine, which he is obsessed with!  He has just about doubled his collection of toy trains over the last two weeks, some as gifts for being a big brave boy this week and two of them for going potty in his big boy potty!  He has done that 3 times.  I know it's probably all by accident, but it's a great start with potty training, since we haven't been trying very hard before now.  He's had such issues with constipation, we haven't focused on it before now.

You were going to get pics of trick or treating, but since my husband restored my computer and hasn't put the driver for the SD card back on, it'll have to wait!  I wrote this post days ago, so I'd better go ahead and publish it!

Suck it, October

This month SUCKS.  Praise Jeebus it only has 3 more days, two of which are weekend.  Work has been awful, Tyler hasn't felt well and will have his endoscopy next week, so he can't take his reflux meds and it's already bothering him.  And, not surprisingly, I'm not pregnant.

Okay, shake it off...letitgo

Good things!  I'm going to have a niece in April!!  My sister in law, who has three wonderful boys that I love to bits, is finally going to have a girl!  I can't wait to meet Elizabeth Grace!!

Tyler peepeed in the potty for the first time yesterday!  With all of his constipation problems, potty training has been delayed for the most part, and it was totally an accident that he went, but it's the first step!  My big boy!!!

Good things...good things...I could probably think of more, but I'm tired and cranky, so that's all I got!  Come on November, bring me good things!

Duh

Today I got a text message from twin. "I can't find my phone. Can you call me?" So I did. She answered right away.
Me: "so you found it."
Twin: *giggles gleefully* "nooooo....how could I text you if I couldn't find my phone?" *more giggles*
Me: *facepalm* "you suck."
I really fell for that. The good news is so did my husband! :-D LOL!
It's been one of those weeks where things just aren't working like they are supposed to! I haven't even really been getting mad about it. It's sort of funny! Monday, I came to work to find my monitor kaput. Tuesday, the scanner wouldn't work. Or rather it wouldn't work FOR ME. Today my vein wouldn't work! They never have a hard time taking my blood and yet....
Ah well, its amusing, really!

ETA: Yeah and now I realize that submitting my blogs via text message posts very short separate entries.  Why on Earth would I want that?!  *rolls eyes*